My goal is to understand the world as my clients
see it, to sense what they are feeling at any given moment, and to meet them, wherever they are. I find that many clients value learning something about recent discoveries in neuroscience, and about how their own brains are working. I encourage the practice of Mindful Meditation as I teach clients to track and attend to the wisdom of their own bodies.
I hear profound and moving themes within the stories clients tell. One is the longing to be found, to be deeply seen, heard, and felt by someone who truly "gets" them. Another is to know all aspects of their own inner lives. We want to weave bewildering, contradictory, or hidden stands of experience into a cohesive story that makes sense. When we create a coherent narrative, we feel a deeper sense of safety in the world.
I often approach these needs by trying to understand and heal the client's Attachment System, the genetic hardwiring in the brain that directs every new born to reach out for connection to the caregivers on whom his or her survival depends. How those individuals respond to us determines how our brains develop, as well as how we see ourselves and our place in the world. When attachment relationships go awry, parts of the self can get lost, and much of our inner lives are closed off. These losses happen outside of awareness, yet they follow us into adulthood - and often bring us into therapy.
The good news is that sensitive, empathic psychotherapy can provide a second chance to create secure attachment. A therapist who truly attunes to a client, who recognizes, welcomes, and makes room for every part of that person within the relationship, creates the safe space where healing and integration can unfold.